Friday, January 18, 2013

Well That's Interesting: Poly Relationship In American Horror Story, Promoting Awareness or Just Attention Getting Taboo?

Courtesy of             

I must warn you that this article will be a bit spoiler-y, as much as I hate spoilers they're kind-of necessary to fully understand how the show handled the touchy topic of polyamory, but not only polyamory, interracial polyamory in the 1960's! I would recommend not reading if you have not seen the most recent episode Continuum which aired 1/16 on FX.

     Lets begin with some background, I'll try to go quickly but there's quite a bit and it won't make sence without it. One of the many stories in this season of American Horror Story follows Kit Walker who was newly married to his African American  bride Alma (in the 1960's mind you) as the show begins. In the first episode they are both taken by aliens (I know, aliens, seriously right? yes, it is as cheesy as it sounds, but the rest of the show is awesome so I ignore the aliens) after which he is returned and she is not. With his now suspiciously missing wife Kit is institutionalized as in Briarcliff because he is assumed to be Bloody Face, the serial killer who has been plaguing Massachusetts. While in Briarcliff he falls in love with Grace, who the aliens promptly take as well. Luckily she is returned to him, impregnated with his baby and they manage to get out of Briarcliff, with a bouncing baby boy and plan to start their life together, only to return to his house and find Alma, returned by the aliens and holding Kit's baby girl.
     Continuum begins some time after they find Alma in their house and shows that the family has adapted to include Kit, Alma, Grace, and both of their children. Although it only shows their life together for a short time it hits on many key points. The appear to have been happy for a long time, talking about all loving one another, but tensions are rising between Alma and Grace. They are not jealous over Kit, quite the contrary, when one is upset the other often tells Kit to go to her, to try to help. Instead they begin to argue because they each process the trauma of the alien abduction differently, Alma wants to forget it all while Grace credits the aliens with the birth and life of her child and views them almost as saviors, she wants to remember and chronicle the events for her children.
     I'd like to believe that the creators of American Horror Story: Asylum saw this as an oportunity to show a successful polyamorous family, they even show the struggles they encounter with the outside world. When they are the victims of an attempted hate crime the police makes no effort to help them, stating that "polyamory is against the law in Massachusetts." Unfortunately I feel that showing another family was just an attempt to be more outrageous in a show already known for explicit scenes of sexuality and violence. When things go wrong, as they inevitably always do in this show, I understand that it was because of differences between people, not because polyamory is wrong and it is impossible to love more than one person, but I worry that the rest of the general public may not see it that way. Kudos to American Horror Story for including a polyamorous relationship in your most recent episode, and even more so for making it so believable and natural. Unfortunately I worry that it might just come across as another media gimmick just like Sister Wives and other shows that make poly lifestyles into something "weird" and filled with drama for the rest of the world to ogle at like some circus side show act.

     As a side note: If you have not watched any American Horror Story you really should, the first and second seasons are two totally different stories but both are fantastic. The first is a straight up ghost story/haunted house while the second season (Asylum) is a little more complex. An abusive-church run asylum, monsters, experiments, demonic possession, serial killers and aliens! Oh My! The second season is quite a bit more gruesome but that is just the nature of the topics. The characters are elaborate and detailed, the story is gripping, the sex is sexy and just a little bit scary, the acting is phenomonal (I love you Jessica Lange) and if the second season is anything like the first it wraps everything up nicely leaving you feeling content with the ending. Go watch it, season 1 is on netflix (I think).

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Wicked Wednesday: An Afternoon Delight

This late night edition of Wicked Wednesday brings us the simple story about a woman who surprises her man at the office, except things don't go exactly as planned. Don't judge too harshly, it's the first time I've written erotica in years, hell probably since high school. Because yes, that is how I spend my days in class in HS, don't judge. Some slight bondage and power exchange but overall pretty vanilla stuff for my foray back into the world of erotica, maybe I'll get a little kinky for next week's Wicked Wednesday, who knows?

     My heals click on the white tile floor as I walk across the lobby of his office building. I've always appreciated the design here, stark white walls and floor, furniture of black, glass, and chrome, sleek sharp lines, mirrors, it was all very modern. After a nod and a wave to the guys at the security desk I step into the elevator, examining myself in the mirrored walls. My hair falls sleek and straight past my shoulders onto my long red coat which sits just above my knees, allowing me to show just a hint of leg between the hem of the coat and my black leather boots. Perfect.
     I finish examining my appearance just as the bell dings and the door opens on to his floor. I take my picnic basket from where I had left it on the floor next to me and make my way towards his door. "Oh, hello dear" says Karen, his secretary, "he's in  one hell of a mood today, he's had quite a morning he has. I tried bringing him some tea and biscuits but maybe you'll have better luck." I've always been comforted by the fact that she's here for him, she keeps an eye on him and never lets him work too hard, acting almost like a mother to him. "Take care of him for me."
     "Oh I will, I brought him a nice lunch" I reply lifting the basket slightly, then I slip a $20 from the pocket of my jacket, "as a matter of fact I'm sure he won't mind if you head down to the sandwich shop down the street and get yourself something nice."
     "Thank you!" she smiles gratefully and reaches for her coat while I turn the knob and step into his office.
     "You will not believe the morning I've had!" he begins as I walk in, I pretty much stop listening there as I absorb the view. He's sitting at his desk, wonderfully disheveled, tie loosened, the first few buttons of his shirt undone. His hair is ruffled from running his fingers through it and his hands wave through the air as he regales me in the tales of his morning. I place the basket delicately onto the table in the corner and turn on my heal to face him. Slowly I begin to unbutton my jacket and let it fall around my feet revealing my black lace panties and my favorite red bra with black lace detailing. "...and then Justin called me and told me that... oh" he breaks off mid sentence and lets out a soft breath as his eye lock with mine and then scan over by body.
     "I thought you might be having a rough day so I figured I'd stop by to make it a little better" I say as I stride across the floor to his chair. I place my hands on either arm of his chair and spin him to face me while I drop to my knees in one fluid movement. "You could use some help relaxing" I whisper, running my hands up and down his thighs. I can see him swell through his trousers as his eyes roam over my back and ass so I let my hands linger over him for just a second before moving upwards to free the button at his waist and slide the cotton down low over his thighs allowing his cock to spring free. I slide my hands over his stomach and hips, warm against his flesh, and breath gently against him while I watch his body tense in anticipation.
     Savoring every second I lower my lips to touch him, beginning by resting them softly against the head of his cock and then letting it slip past my lips and into my my mouth. My eyes raise slowly to meet his and my tongue swirls slowly around his tip; his lips part as his breath quickens while his eyes silently plead with me to stop teasing, and I couldn't be happier to oblige. I quickly push my wet lips down to the base of his shaft, engulfing him entirely, and savor the sound of his gasp of pleasure and the feel of his hands clenching down on my shoulders. He grabs me hard, pushing his hips upward into me and moaning softly as I continue my ministrations. I can feel his arousal mounting, his thrusts becoming more erratic and hurried, his grip tightens and his breath catches, I just love seeing him like this. My hand slips between my legs and my hips unconsciously grind against it making me moan against his hard cock.
     Maybe I was distracted by his pleasure, maybe I was distracted by my own, but whatever it was I didn't notice his body shift, or his hand move to knot tightly in my hair. Suddenly he's standing up, pulling me off of him and shoving me across the room to the small sofa in the corner. Before I can figure out exactly what happened he's got me laying down, back arched over the arm of the sofa and legs sprawled out across the cushions. With one hand he grabs each of my wrists while the other grasps at his tie and deftly wraps it around my wrists, ties it tight, and hooks them onto the small hook where he normally hangs his briefcase, securing me in place. In a matter of seconds, he's turned everything around; what was supposed to be a sexy surprise had become entirely different. I think back, but my mind is fuzzy with pleasure as his fingertips linger over my tingling flesh.
     I was supposed to walk in, seduce him, blow his mind, and walk out, entirely unflustered while he was left a pleasured puddle in his seat.
     His fingers ghost over my sides. 
     I was going to be the sexy seductress, the daring dominant, Jessica Rabbit.
     I feel him on my breasts, just barely not touching my nipple.
     I surprised him for once, I managed that.
     His fingers move lower.
     I know he couldn't have seen this coming.
     Oh god they're on my hips.
     Or maybe he did?
     They slip under the hem of my panties and slide them low over my thighs while I squirm, begging him to quicken, this slow tease is torture.
     Did he know all along? Was this his plan?
     Oh! That's his mouth, his breath warm against my wet pussy.
     Ever the dominant, he was just pretending to let me get the upper hand, and now he's got me exactly where he wants me.
     And there it was, the end of cohesive thought, his soft wet lips made contact with my skin and I was engulfed with pleasure. My hips lift upwards and his hands grasp my hips, tight, his lips engulf my clit and his tongue begins flicking and swirling and I don't even know what but it feels amazing! His hand slips off my hip and around to my ass, grabbing it tight and pulling me into him, helping me ride through wave of wave after pleasure. I pull against the hook on the wall, wanting to grab at him, and squirm and move but it won't budge. The hand gripping my ass slides even lower, slipping around to play with the wetness around my opening then slowly, teasingly, he slips one finger inside me. I gasp quietly and look down to see the playful glimmer in his eyes, he loves to see me like this and he curls that finger seductively upwards while his tongue pushes firmly against my clit and my whole body arches and quakes. I can feel the pleasure in me growing, my moans become quicker and more desperate, we both know what's coming as I try and stifle my moans but he quickly pulls out and away from me. He stands next to me, cock hard and throbbing and looks down at me while I whimper for him to just touch me, anywhere, to give me relief.
     "Oh, now I can't just ignore this lovely lunch you brought me" he says as he walks over to the basket that is he and I both know doesn't have any food in it. He pulls out a simple purple vibrator and turns it on smirking mischievously. He returns to me, sliding the vibrating silicone over my neck and across my collarbones, down between my breasts and across my stomach. My excitement climbs the lower his hands slide and my hips rise to meet the toy, trying to bring it closer to my clit. Finally he slips it between my labia and I quickly slide my legs closed to grip it tightly and grind against it. Almost instantly his other hand it forcing my legs open again, "I want to see" he tells me firmly, he also doesn't want me to cum, at least not yet. The vibrator slips past my clit and pushes it's way into my wet pussy while I let out a gasp of pleasure. He turns up the vibration and thrusts the toy deeper and deeper inside me, despite the overwhelming pleasure I can't help but watch him watch me. His eyes are dark and his lips parted, despite the controlling facade he has built I can see it breaking down, I can how badly he wants me.
     Almost as soon as I notice this he pulls the vibrator out of me and tosses it aside, but before I can miss it his cock is slipping into me, hard and fast. He can't hold back a deep moan of pleasure as he is finally engulfed with me and he thrusts with abandon. My hands come free from the wall and I wrap them around his neck, holding him close to me and lifting my hips to him. We've long since forgotten to be quiet and our moans echo through the room and our pleasure swells and bursts, overwhelming us until our bodies are left quaking in a sweaty pile of hot flesh on flesh.
     I'm not sure how I got dressed, or out to the car, or even home. Somehow he always manages to do that to me, switch everything around, turn it all on it's head in the most amazing ways. What I do remember is the moment where he snatched my panties off the floor and threw them into the drawer of his desk. He said they had to stay there, as a trophy, in memory of his afternoon delight.

Wicked Wednesday... be inspired & share...

Lelo Mia 2 Giveaway

     The Mia 2 is a nifty new travel vibe from Lelo, it's small, discrete, and charges via a USB inside the unit itself! How cool is that? What's even cooler is that Beck is giving one away to one of her lovely followers, because she's just wonderful like that! Even better than that? It's PURPLE!!!! I must have it. If you must try to take this pretty purple joy from me you can enter here. Good luck! (except not really, because I want it!)

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

TMI Tuesday 1/15

Today’s TMI Tuesday topic is sex photography and video.

1. Did you ever pose for pictures in sexual situations, or take pictures of a lover?

I've taken pictures for people sure but never had pictures taken of me during sex.

2. Did you keep these pictures private between yourselves, or did others see them?

I think only me and him have seen him, he wouldn't be comfortable sharing them.

3. Did any of them ever get out in public with embarrassing results?


4. Were you ever videotaped having sex?

Unfortunately no.

5. If so, was the tape ever made public?

Psh, I wish (it's the exhibitionist in me).
6. Were you ever photographed or taped without your knowledge?

Not as far as I know.

Bonus: Post a picture of a body part.

Tis my thumb... and my cat....

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Mini Wondrous Vulva Puppet: Erzuli Review

     Meet the Mini Wondrous Vulva Puppet! She is only slightly larger than the size of my hand but she is a beautiful asset to any sexuality educator and her petite size makes her easy to throw in a bag when you're on the go. For those of you who prefer to teach in front of a crowd you may be interested in the original size.

     Seventeen years ago the project began with one puppet, hand-made by a 40 year old woman in San Fransisco.Since then she has hand crafted 4,000 more, sending a message with each one, for people to share their stories, stories which have inspired many, including Eve Ensler when she compiled "The Vagina Monologues." They are a testament to the beauty of the human body, in beautiful hand crafted form.

     The puppet is not exactly anatomically correct, it is more of an artistic representation of the Vulva; which for those of you not up on your anatomy, is the technical name for that area between a cis-girl's legs, the vagina is only the cavity, the labia, the clitoris, and the vaginal opening are all part of the vulva. While the fact that it does not look exactly like a vulva may seem like a negative when using it as a model I actually really like the design. Often people can be uncomfortable with sexuality and putting a realistic vulva in front of them could just push them over the edge and have them running for the door. This puts a playful spin on things while still representing the parts of the body appropriately. This could also be useful for therapists who specialize in counseling survivors of sexual crimes. The puppet shows the outer labia, inner labia, clitoris, clitoral hood, g-spot, and urethra. One important thing to note is that many diagrams and models often do not display the g-spot or clitoris since their only anatomical purpose is for pleasure (and why would that be important?) Between the two inner labia is a small pocket that represents the vaginal canal, including a small ridged piece of fabric right at the entrance to show the g-spot, the texture is actually quite similar as well. I wish that this was a little further inside since this g-spot is very shallow, pretty much at the opening. Above this is the urethra, represented by a small rose, and above that the clitoris and clitoral hood. The both of these seem a bit larger than I'd prefer. I wish they had tacked down the sides of the fabric a bit better around the hood to make it tighter to the clitoris but if they did that then you would not be able to pull the hood back to reveal the clitoris as you can on a real human body so I understand why they did this.

     Your vulva puppet is available in six standard colors, although they can make custom ones as well for an extra charge, I chose the Erzuli. The outer labia and vaginal canal are made of a felt material while the inner labia, clitoral hood, and clitoris are all made of a silk. The puppet is clearly handmade, when examining the stitching you can see minor imperfections and weaknesses, but this does not become apparent until one looks very closely. This is clearly due to the fact that these are not mass produced but are instead made to order. As long as good care is taken in storing and transporting your vulva puppet I see no reason why it should not last a very long time.

     I think the Vulva Puppet would be a fantastic addition to any educator's arsenal of goodies, it is a perfect visual aid for classes and one on one interactions. It's design makes it comforting for people who may be uncomfortable in the topics of sexuality or experience shame over their body and also finds a unique blend between artistic design and anatomically correct representation. It even works great for displaying my more unique toys such as my We-Vibe III! It's fantastic to finally see a model that focuses on the beauty and the potential for pleasure that the human body is capable of, unfortunately though it focuses only on external anatomy, including only the g-spot internally, so it does have it's limits; not showing the cervix, a-spot, or clitoral legs.

Want to learn more? Buy your vulva puppet or take classes here!

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Sex Negativity and Hate

     It always upsets me when I am reminded of how sex negative our society can be, especially when I hear it from people I trust and care very deeply for. My fiance obviously knows of my obsession with learning about sex and all things sexy which obviously extends into an interest in human nature and relationships, and to an extent his family does too. He may not understand it and he may even (unintentionally) shame or mock me for my admittedly different obsession but he tries his best to support me in what I do and care about. He even bought me the book Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha (a fantastic book which I'm sure you'll be hearing more about as soon as I finish it) and wrapped it neatly under the tree next to my Mickey Mouse cookie jar and the complete series of Battlestar Galactica on blu-ray (it's true he really does love me!).
     I'm currently about halfway into the book and I'm so excited and fascinated by the things I'm learning that I feel compelled to share this information with everyone I talk to. The book studies human relationships from roughly three different angles, the relationships of our ancestors, the relationships of tribes in less developed areas, and the relationships of our closest primate relatives (the chimps and bonobos) and uses this evidence to question if the standard narrative of relationships and human nature is based in historical, biological, and anthropological fact or if it is a societal creation. Really interesting stuff, although it is a bit of a tough read with a LOT of facts I'd recommend it to anyone, anyway, I got a bit sidetracked.
     This afternoon I was reading a particularly interesting chapter about societies (mostly located in the Amazon) that believe that a pregnancy is the result of multiple sex acts. Any woman who is sexually active is "a little pregnant" as the fetus is simply an accumulation of semen. Based on this principal these women will have sex with multiple partners in the tribe, hoping to imbue the child with the positive qualities of each. Once the child is born it will be nursed by each of the women in the tribe. There is no fight for paternity because the child refers to every male in the tribe as "father" and each female as "mother" while each adult will treat every child as their own.
     The geek that I am was fascinated by this culture so I shared it with both my fiance and his father who happened to be in the room. I always thought of him as fairly open minded although sometimes a bit ignorant but I was shocked by the shameful and hateful language I heard from him after I shared the information I had just read. He began by asking what "idiots- I mean 'cultures'" believed this and when I responded by telling him that it was a common belief in some areas of South America he went on a tirade about it being those "illegal immigrants with too many kids that they don't take care of." I choose not to mention that I said SOUTH America not CENTRAL America, but as I tried to further explain the culture, how the children were growing up much more socially developed and they had less incidence of war he continued with his hateful speech. He talked about them all being "whores" and "of course they have no war they spend all day fucking each other." He even went so far as to say that this was why they were "all diseased and dying of AIDS" because they had "kids sucking on everyone's dirty tits."
     Honestly I was outraged, I'm not blind, I know that his family does harbor some hate, and I've heard it from my fiance himself but I've made it quite clear that I don't appreciate that attitude around me, but this was outrageous! I can chalk some of it up to ignorance but there's only so much, and I won't lie, I was hurt. I didn't say as much as I wish I did, but I must admit, I don't know very much about the topic so I couldn't argue much and I'm a relatively passive person so it's not like me to argue, especially with someone I like and honestly view almost as a father. While it came as a bit of  shock and it was obviously upsetting I should have seen it coming, there's a lot he doesn't understand and comes off sounding a bit hateful towards (ie: people who are transgendered "I understand wanting to be a woman but what woman would ever want to be a guy?!?!?!") but I guess this just hit a little closer to home than all the others. It just reminds me that no matter how far we've come in the world of sexuality there's so much further that we have to go, there's still so much ignorance out there and ignorance just breeds hate; but for now I might keep my plans to get my master's in sex education a bit closer to the chest when around my fiance's family.

The Sin Doll and her Bad Dragon: Cole the Dane Giveaway!

Now listen,  Bad Dragon toys are seriously bad ass, and also a little bit strange, but that's okay, I like that. They're also seriously expensive though, they do offer a sample set so you can see what you think of their silicone, as well as offering each toy in multiple sizes and even offering you those with slight defects at a heavily discounted price, but either way they're still damn pricy. Which makes it all the more awesome that The Sin Doll is giving one away to her awesome followers! How sweet is that?!?!?! Check it all out here!

TMI Tuesday

1. What feels better, the moment right before cumming, the moment of cumming, or the moment right after cumming?

Hmmm... I'd have to say the moment right before, I love the build up... it can be frustrating though when the "moment" right before won't end. Like teetering on a cliff but unable to take the plunge.

2. For the fellas: it is said that guys will fuck anything that moves. but what if you’re a hippie who’s in love with the wind, how would that relationship work out?

I'm choosing to answer this even though it doesn't apply, I'd say it would require a lot of masturbation, in a big, open, windy field.

3. For the ladies: what would be your first gut reaction after the guy you’re on a first date with after months of online chatting looks you straight in the eye and whispers to you even before saying hi, “let’s fuck like rabbits…”?

This depends a lot on the context of the online chatting, and how comfortable with him I was and how safe I felt with him, also the context of the first date.As a note for future suitors though I'd prefer a "HI" first.

4. There can only be ONE!!! okay, you have to choose EITHER your dream man/woman/lover/partner or your dream job, one or the other, not both. Which do you choose for the rest of your life and why?

 Dream job, I guess that's terrible though huh? I'd probably find a partner who was open to polyamory so that way I could have multiple partners who satisfy different needs, I can only have one job and I HAVE to work, I don't HAVE to be in a relationship.

5. Is love itself, being in love, crazy? Or is the world crazy, and love serves to heal a crazy world? or is it that you’re crazy and the world is just fine? I guess what i’m asking from you is for a little treatise on the general topic of love and craziness. what is love?…baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me…

The world is crazy and love is just a part of a big old crazy world. Society puts so many rules on love and what is "acceptable" and what we should want that it makes it difficult and so much more complicated that it needs to be.

Bonus: If all of us in the blogging community pooled our resources together and chained our blogs in unison into one big shining electrical power line of humanity, could we save the world?

We could, but we'd a boost from The Doctor's Sonic Screwdriver ;)

Monday, January 7, 2013

A Cautionary Tale

      Today I want to share with you a story, a fable of sorts, so that you may not make the same mistake I did. Having reached the end of my current list of products to review I went into my box of rarely used toys that I have acquired over time but had little interest in looking for my next product to review. As I dug into the box I noticed one of the bags containing a toy was a bit damp and sticky, and as I furrowed deeper I noticed that there were more and more product packages with this residue on it. I began to wonder if one of the many lotions and potions, lubes and arousal gels that I had sitting in the box began to leak. Unfortunately I quickly came to the root of the problem.
     I stumbled across a cheap jelly vibrating c-ring that I had tossed carelessly into the bin, with the side almost entirely melted off. It had slipped and been resting next to a massage mitt of a similar material. Allowing these toys to come into contact with one another had created a chemical reaction and the surface of the toy is now permanently destroyed. This is the reason that I always recommend storing your toys in a protective bag and separate from one another as well as using only water based lubes with silicone toys. I had been meaning to do this intentionally and see exactly what the reaction was one day but this wasn't exactly what I had in mind, at least it was an educational experience!

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Extase Elegance Vibrator Review

Vibration Strength: 4/5 
Noise: 2/5
Ease of Use: 3/5
Ease of Care: 4/5
Material Safety: 5/5
Overall: 4/5

Pros:                                           Cons:
+ Buttery smooth silicone              - Cheep feeling controls
+ Two motors                              - Hard to press buttons
+ Rechargable                              - Strange Smell
+ Water Resistant                         - White Silicone Charge Cover
+ Fancy Packaging and Storage Bag


     The Elegance vibrator by Extase is a multi-speed traditional vibrator designed perfectly for thrusting. I personally really love thrusting with my internal toys and I find that many luxury toys are designed more as dual stimulation (rabbit) vibrators (which make it difficult to thrust as the clitoral stimulator gets in the way), or as g-spot vibrators (which are often shorter as they are designed to hit a shallower spot than some of the more sensitive areas in the back of the vaginal canal) so I was really excited to find this one. Despite it's simple design it cannot be seen as anything other than a luxury toy, the silicone is buttery smooth, the vibrations are strong and it even features TWO motors!

Materials, Texture, and Care

     The entire body of the toy is made of 100% silicone with a small amount of a plastic like material covering the control pad. The silicone is totally body safe, non-porous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic. It can be sanitized by cleaning it with a 10% bleach solution but for simple cleaning before and after use wiping it down with warm soap and water should be sufficient. It can be stored easily in a the storage pouch that is included with it or in the sturdy packaging.

     Can I just begin by saying that I am absolutely in love with the silicone on this toy, it is delightful. I had heard the phrase "buttery silicone" before and I never really understood the phrase until now. This toy is so smooth that I can just sit there running my hands over it! Also, this type of silicone does not seem to collect very much lint so that makes it even better. The texture is relatively smooth except for 6 ringed grooves in the surface around the tip. I only noticed them a little bit but they are relatively deep and would definitely be noticed by those that are texture sensitive. You also need to be sure to clean out these crevices after use as it is easy for bacteria to get caught here. I recommend a soft bristled toothbrush to scrub it clean. I did notice that out of the packaging the material had a strange smell, slightly chemical but not bad, almost like a cheep purfume. Despite the washing it has not gone away but it has lessened, I notice no taste and the smell does not concern me.

     At 9 inches long (approximately 5.5 inches insertable) and 4.5 inches in circumferance at it's widest point this is far from a small toy but it also isn't a size queen exclusive. Despite these measurments the design of the shaft makes it feel quite filling. The end that features the control panel is the widest then it thins out around the middle and curves slightly upwards and swells at the tip, similar to the head of a penis. This design could be used to glance along the G-Spot but it would not be a toy that I would recommend for someone specifically trying to explore the G-spot.

Vibration Functions/Controls

     The Elegance has a similar control pad to Lelo's products, featuring up and down buttons as well as plus and minus buttons. Each time you push the buttons they illuminate, push the (+) to turn it on and increase the speeds and the (-) to decrease the speeds and turn it off (revolutionary I know!). The up and down buttons are designed to cycle through the five (5) patterns available. Hold both the up and down buttons for five seconds and you will notice the lights illuminate and then dim; The toy is now locked for travel, do the same to unlock it.
     What's really unique about this toy is that it features two motors, one in the tip and one further down the shaft. This creates a really unique sensation with the motors wirking either simultaniously or bouncing back and forth off of each other. This is probably for someone who not onlys patterns but is also the type to enjoy leaving the toy inserted, I personlly perfer vigorous thrusting so I feel that the movement makes the vibration patterns less noticable. I actually had to check the box to see how many speeds there were as they were very difficult to count, I will try to describe them to the best of my ability below.
  1. Steady vibration in the motor in the tip
  2. Steady vibration in both motors
  3. Alternating between motors
  4. Faster alternating between motors
  5. Really awesome pulsing/rotating between the motors. It took me forever to figure out a way to describe this one, I had to wrap my tip tight around the tip to really feel it.
     The vibrations themselves are very rumbly I only wish they were a bit more powerful. On it's highest it ever so barely falls short for me and makes it a bit difficult for me to finish, though it is possible if I am very turned on. What is fantastic is that even with this much power they are virtually silent, a very low 2/5 and only when both motors are engaged, only with one motor it is easily a 1/5.
     My biggest complaint about this toy (and probably the only thing keeping it from being a 5/5) is the control panel. It feels a very cheap considering how much it costs, and compared to the rest of the toy (especially the yummy silicone). Its a thin plastic with the buttons fitting into it, the buttons themselves aren't very responsive, especially my (+) button. The remainder of the buttons work the majority of the time but they are still quite difficult to be sure that they are being depressed (which makes the light-up console very handy). I'm quite dissapointed in this considering the ammount I paid for it and I wish that they had put in the extra effort to make it match the quality of the rest of the product.


     The Elegance is rechargable through a small port in the base. The port is covered with a white silicone cover (which I'm not a fan of, I wish they had made it match the rest of the toy, it stands out like a sore thumb and looks rather odd) which makes it at least water resistant if not waterproof. I would be more than comfortable using it in a shower and I don't worry while washing it but the manual cautions against submerging it. The charger itself is USB but it also comes with an AC adapter for a standard US wall outlet. It cannot be used while charging and should not be charged for more than 24 hours at a time. You'll know it is time to charge you Elegance because the control panel will emit a red sheen, once it is plugged in the lights on the control panel will pulse.


     I must admit, I'm a sucker for toys in fancy packaging and this is no dissapointment. It is made of a hard cardboard with a hard cardboard lid that fits over the entire box. The lid it white with the image of the toy and tons of information on the side describing its features. While it is very informative I wish they had made it a plainer more discrete top, I remember reading one review where the reviewer covered the top in a decorative paper, and I might do the same. The base it a simple black box where the toy sits and a drawer that sits below containing the directions, charger, a pamphlet listing some of their other toys and a really really REALLY nice pouch. No really, this is probably the nicest pouch I have ever gotten with a toy. It is just the right size for the Elegance (unlike some companies that give you massive pouches for tiny toys, I'm looking at you Jopen) and is made of a relatively high quality suade with what feels like a purple nylon liner. It even has a draw string with little metal tips and a thick metal to tighten it (which works quite well). The bag is so nice that I begin to wonder if they took the money they saved on the control panel and used it here! In all serriousness though, this is a really lovely bag and it means a lot to me to see a company goes the extra mile like this.


     There are so many things that I absolutly love about this toy, most importantly is the reason I bought it. The length and shape is perfect for thrusting and hitting the deeper and harder to reach sensative areas around the cervix (what some people may refer to as the U-spot). The ever so slight curve and swelling at the tip makes it perfect for that as well. The instant I opened the fantastic box and felt the silicone I was it love, it was by far the smoothest I have ever felt. Then theres the vibrations! They're so unique since they feature two motors, I really love the pulsing/rotation between the two motors, it almost feels like the contractions you can feel in the male penis during ejaculation. So cool!
     Unfortunatly, despite all of this, there are some, few, but some things that I do not love, namely the control panel. It's like putting a big zit on Olivia Wilde's otherwise perfect face. The plastic feels cheap and the buttons feel weak and non-responsive. So many times while I'm playing I need to stop and check the control panel while I fiddle with the buttons looking for the light that means I'm getting some responce. Please Extase! Re-release my Elegance with better controls, and a tad more power! I'll buy it I will! But also get rid of that strange smell...

    I want to tell you to drop everything, go to your nearest store (or favorite website) and buy this toy, and then stick it wherever makes you feel all warm and fuzzy and toe-curly. Unfortunately, the control panel is holding me back from giving it a full fledged 5/5, and it's ability to be the closest to the kind of power I need without being quite right. For now this is my favorite toy (since I'm waiting on a replacement of my Jopen vr5, and anyway,  can't thrust with that, its more for rocking) but unfortunately I can see it being easily replaced. While the vibrations are lovely, the silicone is delicious, and the dual motors is just plain nifty, it just turns out being too much work to control.

Find the Extase Elegance at Eden Fantasys! It's even on sale at the time of this posting!